dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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