He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
