i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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