I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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