Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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