ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Bring me that man meat
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Oh god it's open bar.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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