scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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