i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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