It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
