i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
