Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
The beers last night were like the tears from god
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Randomize
