I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Randomize
