But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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