From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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