Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Randomize
