Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Randomize
