I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
