Are we in a gay sports bar?
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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