2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
