Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
How many fucks given?
0.12846
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize