you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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