worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
