Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
