spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
