I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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