soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
