So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
