just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
