absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
