Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
