So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize