What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
