Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
