im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
