so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
