mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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