I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
We named our party play list daddy issues
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
