yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
