just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I just googled if crying burns calories
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
