I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
