FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
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