Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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