Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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