problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
