I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
Randomize
