You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
