they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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