it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
