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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
