This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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