Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize